- Fear of FAILURE
- Fear of SUCCESS
- Fear of UNCERTAINTY
- Fear of REJECTION OR DISAPPROVAL
Which one can you relate to? Which one rings a bell inside of you? Go with your gut if you are unsure. Which one holds the most power over you?
My core fear is Rejection or Disapproval. I will go to great lengths to be liked, or to be seen as “good enough. So when I'm feeling small about myself, what do I do? I seek approval, I seek acceptance, I seek to be seen and heard.
To be liked. It’s my core Belief around value and worth, traveling up from childhood - which makes sense, as we all have a little child operating within, no matter how old we are.
As an example, when I feel like someone is upset with me, I start to make up stories about myself - I’m too pushy, or I’m too demanding, I don’t communicate well, she didn’t respond to me, etc. - I create an entire illusion as I have no evidence for any of this and it is just simply to feed my FEAR around REJECTION.
How do I know I’m in my core fear? I feel less than authentic, I feel outside of myself, and I want to control or manipulate the situation. I also experience a heaviness in my heart; I don’t feel fully alive.
These are big keys that I’ve identified for me. What are yours?
Awareness is the key to change, so knowing that REJECTION is my core fear, I can observe myself, or “Spy on Myself” to see how I am showing up in my world. Once I see, I can choose a different response, one that is authentically me. The tip off is how you feel!
I can chose to be honest by admitting to myself that I’m in my fear of rejection. I chose to leave myself by giving myself away for the sake of another. In order to come back to myself, I have to tell my little child within "I’m here and I have you, and you don’t have to please anyone; you are perfect just the way you are!”
BOOM.... the truth.... leads to freedom..... this is a much better road to walk down, yes?
Where do you go? I know when I’m in my freedom and feeling authentic, and I also know when I’m in my false self and feeling like a phoney!
Share your core fear or fears with me, I would love to explore this subject more as I believe it is worth the time and effort.
In fact, my upcoming Beautiful Life Retreat - May 13-15th - will explore this subject at an experiential level, where learning becomes lifestyle. Join me this May!